TELL ME ABOUT YR DAILY MAKEUP ROUTINE and also about which harry potter characters should make out and which marvel characters should make out
DAILY MAKEUP ROUTINE: ideally, I start with moisturizer, but by “ideally” I mean “almost never” because even though moisturizer is just a few additional moments of rubbing stuff on my face in a whole long list of rubbing stuff on my face, for some reason I seem to find it objectionable. I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO TELL YOU. Then concealer, under my eyes/on my eyelids/over any blemishes, applied with my fingers; then foundation, which I currently apply with a big fluffy brush that is technically for powder, but I change around foundation and brushes every few months. Then bronzer — at my temples and swept lightly underneath my cheekbones and chin with a blush brush — and the I use the same brush to add a little bit of blush on the apples of my cheek. I do my eyes next but that varies day by day: sometimes I use liquid liner and sometimes pencil and sometimes gel; sometimes I use three eyeshadow and sometimes one and sometimes none; sometimes my eyeliner is brown and sometimes it’s black and sometimes it’s navy blue or grey or purple; I rotate between like 4 different mascaras. This, I should be clear, is because eye makeup is FUN for me — nobody’s routine should be this intensive unless they, like me, are a makeup freak. And then last brows and lips, because the heaviness of my brows sometimes determines my lip color, and vice versa.
Regarding which characters should make out, tbh my feeling is ALL OF THEM, so long as it is convincingly written. For example, until recently I only passively shipped Tony/Bruce and didn’t ship Tony/Hulk at all, and then I read this amazing fic called Irreconcilable Differences (that I can’t link to because I’m on mobile but which you should read) and now I’m obsessed. Writing over everything, is my feeling. I’ll buy almost anything if it’s sold well enough.
Since you seem to have Certain Ship Leanings *cough* judging by your other Harry Potter-related answer, what are your favorite Harry/Draco fanfictions? Or if they're not something you generally read, what is your headcanon for their relationship?
While I do read Harry/Draco, I tragically cannot give you a list of my favorites because — and this is why you should never ask me for fic recs, guys — I am the least organized person on the face of the earth and I don’t remember the titles or authors of things I’ve read for more than about 20 minutes after I’ve finished reading them. So if I were going to make you a list of my favorite Harry/Draco fics it would look something like this:
This one I read as a teenager where Harry was dying and you spend the whole story thinking that Draco’s going to save him but then Harry DOES die and you CAN’T BELIEVE IT and this image of Draco feeding him like, sugared plums or some shit stays with you for the next decade and makes you sad every time you think of it.
There was one? Where they played Spin the Bottle a lot? But honestly the more I think about it the more I think my memory of this fic is actually an amalgam of all the pre-book 7 Hogwarts H/D I used to read where they’re like, in the castle drinking Butterbeer having shenanigans and fucking in the Room of Requirement. REMEMBER ALL THE FIC WHERE THEY FUCKED IN THE ROOM OF REQUIREMENT, god. Let’s hope nobody ever requires a blacklight.
GOD, that one with Dean/Luna as a background ship and Harry/Draco are so CODEPENDENT and it’s all so deliciously fucked up and Draco is like, pretending to be a Death Eater while he and Harry secretly plot things and Harry slowly becomes less and less human and more and more weapon and Draco panics about it secretly and plots a lot and then I think they eventually end up moving to the desert.
THE ONE WHERE DRACO IS A BARISTA
All the ones that Maya wrote which are no longer on the internet and
This one, which I can link you to solely because it’s on my Kindle and thus I can remember its name, and which you should definitely read because it’s incredible.
DON’T BE LIKE ME, KIDS. It’s a weird, messy life I lead.
In terms of my headcanons for what their relationship is like: volatile, because that’s more or less what stability looks like for both of them, deeply fucked up as they are. Draco caring an immense amount and not being able to say so. Harry caring an immense amount and saying so constantly, but in horrible ways that typically feature shouting and drive Draco completely insane. Shared disdain for most of the rest of humanity that Harry pretends is irritability due to his high-stress job and that Draco knows is disdain because people are terrible and inferior and if the world worked according to him he would be their aloof god king. Getting hideously drunk together on holidays until they can laugh like they’re not both thinking of family dead or imprisoned. Teasing and prodding the best and the worst out of each other. A lot of prank voicemails.
eyeliner advice? i've gotten medium-decent at gel and liquid over time, but i still spend a lot of time looking at other people's selfies and going HOW.
Sit your eyeliner down for a serious talk and explain to it that you are the boss. Eyeliner needs a strong, guiding hand. If it can sense fear, it will take advantage of you.
FOR REAL THOUGH: the best things you can do to improve your eyeliner game are a) practice a bunch, b) always be TOUCHING PART OF YOUR HAND TO YOUR FACE while you apply because that will ground you and prevent shaking/slippage, and c) buy one of those mirrors that has a side with a higher-than-standard magnification. It took me a long time to bite the bullet and do that last one, and I was then amazed by what a difference it made. Shockingly, the ability to actually see what you are doing has an affect on how it’s done! And like, I know it doesn’t seem like that extra magnification is going to do much for you but: trust me. It does.
Any advice for a bisexual lady who feels guilty sometimes about noticing the hotness of other ladies b/c they get enough of That Sort of Thing from Men? I don't think I'm creepy but sometimes I feel like I'm betraying the sisterhood by being attracted to them.
Oh man I know this feel SO HARD. I actually have a dude friend who I fight with about this particular concept all the time, because if he’s like, “Damn, that girl is so pretty,” I’m like, “Fuck yeah she is!” but if he’s like, “Damn, let’s stand here and stare openly at the crowd of women walking by in tiny shorts,” I’m like, “Don’t be a pig,” and he’s like, “I DON’T UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS DIFFERENT TO WHAT WE DID BEFORE.” In fairness to him, I can see how it could be confusing. In fairness to me, openly staring at women like they’re animals is disgusting and he should stop.
I think — and this goes for all people about all people — the most important thing is to be respectful of others. You don’t have to feel guilty for being attracted to women — you’re attracted to women! Noticing women you’d be interested in doing the horizontal mambo with come with the territory, and there is nothing inherently wrong with that. Where the guilt comes from, I think, is that we were raised in a culture that objectifies women to such a degree that it has actually, in our minds, equated being attracted to women with objectifying them. But that is not the situation! By all means it makes sense to feel guilty in the event that you catch yourself behaving in a gross or objectifying way — cat-calling, openly drooling, standing in the middle of the street staring, following a woman around whistling, touching a woman without their permission, expecting or feeling owed sex from a woman for more or less any reason, harassing a woman in any way. But I don’t think someone who was doing those things would be sending me this ask, so I’m pretty certain you don’t have anything to feel guilty about. Attraction and objectification are not the same thing, no matter how hell-bent popular media seems to be on convincing us they are. <3
gyzym, how do you put lipstick on? there is just no way i can do it without looking like an evil monster clown.
I know this struggle, friend. There are a couple of options — one of them, tragically, is just “spend some hours in front of the mirror putting lipstick on and taking it off again until you get better at it” — but your best and most foolproof plan is to go to your local makeup store/cosmetics aisle and buy yourself a lip brush. I use this one by Japonesque, which I freely admit I bought largely because it’s cute and I had a $5 off coupon at Ulta that day, but pretty much any lip brush will work. You could also, if you [are cheap/are broke/can’t justify this type of purchase to yourself/want to try this method before you invest], go to Sephora, try on some lipsticks and then ask for a sample with a disposable lip brush or two thrown in. They will do that thing for you.
The great thing about a lip brush is that it gives you about a million percent more control over where the lipstick ends up on your face; just load up both sides by running them across the lipstick of your choice and then carefully fill in your lips. It will help to be sitting down, with your elbow resting against a stable surface — this will ground your arm, and keep your hand from shaking too much. You can also always apply lipstick as you normally do, and then come at your mouth afterward with a Q-tip dipped in makeup remover to clean up the edges! Experiment with it a little and you’ll find what works for you.
(P.S. If you have a lip brush or any other kind of makeup brush and you find yourself thinking, “Hey, maybe I should clean this!” trust that instinct, it’s correct. Get a bowl and put a squirt of baby shampoo in the bottom, add a centimeter or two of water, put the brush in it and rub it against the bottom of the bowl until it releases all of its pigments etcetera and turns the water a nasty color. Then just rinse the brush and lay it on a towel, ideally on a slightly slanted surface with the bristles facing down so water doesn’t drip into the glue and start eroding it — I use the top of my toilet tank — and let dry overnight.)
You're allowed to write one fanfic per fandom. What do you include from canon, what do you change, and how do you work with characterization?(for simplification, I'm gonna keep the trend of Harry Potter and bring up your Pie Situation with Star Trek redeux.)
I CAN’T ANSWER THE STAR TREK PART OF THIS QUESTION BECAUSE IT HAS ALREADY BEEN ANSWERED IN HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF WORDS BY THE FANFIC SWITCH, WHICH IS THE BEST FANFIC THAT HAS EVER BEEN FANFICCED AND WHICH IS PERFECT IN ALL WAYS. Like honest to god, if I could write any Star Trek fic it…. would be Switch, only it would never be as good as Switch because nothing compares to Switch because Switch is Peak Fanfiction, it is what all fanfiction should aspire to be, god it’s so amazing.
In terms of Potter, what I’d like to write more than anything — and I recognize that this is the result of a sickness within me but it just can’t be helped — is an AU from Minerva McGonagall’s point of view, covering her years as a student at Howarts and her tumultuous affair with Tom Riddle (I’m sorry, I know, I can’t help that I am this way), her teaching the Mauraders, her teaching the Trio, all of it. I love the idea that Dumbledore is to Grindlewald as McGonagall is to Voldemort, except that in McGonagall’s case what came between them was Minerva standing up and defending the rights of the people who would be caught in the crosshairs of Riddle’s ideology, as opposed to, you know, Riddle killing her abused and wounded sibling and her eventually turning into a terrifying manipulative nightmare person who builds weapons out of children, I MEAN, WHAT, WHO DOES THAT IN THE HARRY POTTER SERIES, WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. Point being: 100 million words of complex layered screwed up gorgeous brilliant Minerva McGonagall growing and changing and teaching and guiding; 100 million words of Minerva McGonagall standing, once a year, at the edge of the Forbidden Forest, and allowing herself just a moment of the sweet ecstasy of loving Tom: wholly and with all of herself, despite his madness and his vanity and all the horrors he’s rained down upon their world and how much she hates him for what he’s become, before closing herself off to it and striding back inside. Because maybe she does love him, but she hates what he’s done, what he does, and what he’s doing, and that matters so much more than the memory of what was once between them. Because she’s stronger than that love will ever be, and perhaps she can’t help it, but she is not now and never shall be resigned.
what's your favorite type of bread? and what's your opinion on pumpkin flavored things?
Some Breads, in order of how much I like to consume them: SOURDOUGH, challah, real bagels (ie, boiled and then baked), ciabatta, properly cooked rye bread (sometimes you go places and the rye bread is undercooked because I guess there are people who like it that way, and no offense to those people, but you’re wrong and you should feel wrong), anything with rosemary in it, and multigrain in ways I am intensely specific and weird about because — and this may shock you, tumblr — I am a deeply odd person who takes food Very Seriously and also sunflowers seeds have no place being anywhere but on top of a bread, why are they so often found inside.
My opinion on pumpkin flavored things is I LOVE THEM, but actually I always laugh because pumpkin itself has a really mild flavor, and what we generally think of as pumpkin flavor is actually the flavor of the spices most commonly associated with pumpkin. Having said that, these muffins are my favorite dessert in all the world, and I make them year round, regardless of whether or not it is pumpkin season. They are the best. They are the top. They will ruin other chocolate chip muffins for you forever and you will not even be sorry.
Two questions: 1-what kind of soup and was it delicious? 2-Harry Potter: Harmony or Romione?
1. This season’s first batch of Everything But The Kitchen Sink Soup, which is chicken noodle soup that I throw matzo balls and pearl onions and mushrooms and pulled chicken into and which, not to toot my own horn, is EXCEPTIONALLY delicious, and,
2. Between those two choices, Romione, because they inspire intensity and passion in each other in a way Harry and Hermione just don’t, and also, Ron’s no picnic but Harry is a bottomless pit of PTSD and emotional issues that Hermione would attempt to fix if they were together, and that is no good. However, if I am to speak my heart, then what we’re looking at is a few years of post-war Ron/Hermione until a breakup caused by the sudden and white-hot explosion of Ron/Pansy, leading Hermione to take a few years to focus doggedly on her career and herself while slowly developing and eventually falling into lifelong fulfilling committed Hermione/Luna. (*cough* and Harry/Draco in the background *cough* WHAT WHO SAID THAT WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.)
as someone putting a LOT of thought into this today: top make up tips to distract from the fact that you were up wayyyyy too late last night? or alternatively: best lipstick brands/colors/types found in your travels?
Regarding staying up too late the night before and/or looking like a raccoon that has recently lost a fight with a hangover (maybe it’s just me that looks that way after a bad night’s sleep, but hey, just in case): a good, lightweight concealer is your best friend. I use NYX’s HD Photogenic Concealer Wand for this, because it’s like $5 and it’s just the right consistency in my opinion, but YMMV. The important part is: apply that shit under your eyes in a downward pointing triangle, and then put whatever is left on the wand ON TOP OF YOUR EYELID as like a primer that’ll conceal puffyness and redness. Blend with your finger, stare at your reflection in awe of how suddenly bright eyed and bushy tailed you look, and then put on your eyeliner a little thicker than you might normally — that’ll help hide the way the conceal will fade out toward the edges of the eye as the day wears on.
Regarding lipsticks: in my humble opinion there is no lipstick above Mac’s PLUMFUL, which is on my lips as we speak and basically every day of my life because it’s perfect and I’m obsessed with it. But if you don’t feel like shelling out $16 for a lipstick, or if you like me cannot afford to be shelling out $16 for a lipstick but unlike me possess a modicum of self control and actually refrain from purchasing it, Almay does a line of moisturizing lip glosses called Color & Care that are much cheaper, non-sticky, and feel great on the lips, and the color Just Plum Good is a pretty decent dupe for the effect Plumful has. To be clear, it’s not a dupe of the lipstick AT ALL, they’re very different in texture and feel and the Almay needs reapplication pretty regularly, but both are soft, subtle plums that you can layer for a brighter look.
so, i just ate like, twice as much soup as any person should eat in one sitting and will be essentially useless for the next 45 minutes, SO: let us have a question time, in which you ask me things and i tell you what i think the answers are.
you may, of course, feel free to ask me anything, but for reference, topics on which i can reliably be expected to know what i’m talking about include food, makeup, Bisexual Struggles, feelings, and which characters from an assortment of books, movies and tv shows should probably make out with each other. topics on which i would NOT trust my opinions include any variant on the theme spacial reasoning, directions, or how much soup one person should eat in a sitting — i was just recently very wrong about that. i don’t have anon on because my self-preservation instinct is too strong, but if you want me to answer a question anonymously, lemme know in the ask and i’ll use internet magics (read: copy/paste) to make a post without your name in it.
Your tags on the "Sherlock/Decency" Elementary photoset you reblogged reflect my opinion of both this show and Sherlock Holmes in general so perfectly, it literally was word for word what I would have written about that set! On that note, since we apparently view Holmes very similarly, I have curiosities: a) Do you have a favourite all time adaptation of Holmes? and b) What's your opinion of the Robert Downey, Jr. movie? (I swear I go back and forth on it every time I watch!)
I love a truly absurd number of Holmes adaptations, but if I had to pick an all-time favorite, it’d be these two fics by Katie Forsythe: Four Minor Interludes for the Solo Violin and Hallowed Be Thy Name (also available as incrediblepodfics). There are so many things to say about these stories — they’re so beautifully constructed! So poignant! So faithful to the source material! They’re written to slot perfectly into the ACD canon, to the point that I often forget that they aren’t part of it! But the reason they’re my favorite is because, of every Holmes adaptation I’ve ever encountered (and it’s… a large number…), this Holmes and this Watson ring the most true for me. Watson as she writes him is the perfect balance of patience and exasperation, of pathos and levity; he carries his war with him in real, visible ways, but never loses either his ability to fight or his inclination against doing so; he takes such care with Holmes, with their clients, holds himself to such high standards and tries so hard to do what’s right, even when circumstances are at their most dire; he is so wholly good, complex and wounded and dangerous and gentle but good, above all. And this HOLMES, who is the very epitome of the type of decency we love to see in this character — a survivor in every sense of the world, plagued by all manner of demons, and yet still able to open his heart to the people he loves, and his mind to anyone who might need him. These stories are a triumph, a classic; to be completely honest, I prefer them to the canon. They are that good.
(Second place: The Great Mouse Detective. Music! Killer robots! A version of Holmes that goes by Basil of Baker Street, presumably for copyright reasons, and IS A MOUSE IN A LONG COAT WITH A MAGNIFYING GLASS, presumably for reasons of being delightful! Dogs who help solve crimes! Evil bats! Evil rats! A tiny mouse-girl in a tartan hat! WHAT IS NOT TO LOVE.)
On the topic of the RDJ films: to be honest I adore them, though they are without question flawed, but you cannot go by me. 2009!Holmes was one of my early fandoms (or, at least, one of my early fandoms under this specific moniker), and once you’ve written a novella turning a specific version of Holmes and Watson into ridiculous American graduate students, I think you’re contractually obligated to love the film they came from. Also — and I mean this from the bottom of my heart — only Jude Law is capable of producing a mustache worthy of John Watson’s face. Jude Law, and Jude Law alone.
“The thing about an anxiety disorder is that you know it is stupid. You know with all your heart that it wasn’t a big deal and that it should roll off of you. But that is where the disorder kicks in; Suddenly the small thing is very big and it keeps growing in your head, flooding your chest, and trying to escape from under your skin. You know with all of your heart that you’re being ridiculous and you hate every minute of it. The fact that many people don’t recognize or have patience for your illness only makes everything worse.”—
I once had a therapist tell me that having an anxiety disorder is like having a faulty alarm system wired up in your brain — instead of going off just when there’s danger (like it would for somebody without an anxiety disorder), it goes off all the time, over little things that don’t actually warrant an anxious response at all. It’s like one of those asshole smoke detectors that everyone’s dealt with at some point or another, the ones that go off whenever you turn on the oven or try to cook something on the stove — you can yell “OH MY GOD, I’M JUST BOILING WATER” all you want, but the stupid thing is going to blare on undeterred. That’s what having an anxiety disorder is like: it’s the smoke detector, and you’re the person on the ground yelling “SHUT UP, SHUT UP, THERE ISN’T ANY FUCKING FIRE.”
Under normal circumstances I don’t talk about my mental health stuff on the internet much — out of anxiety, actually, more than anything else — but I wanted to chime in here because I think this is something people really don’t understand about anxiety disorders. Friends: we know it’s irrational. We know we need to calm down, that things aren’t as bad as we think they are, that our reactions are making things worse than they need to be, that it’s all in our heads. We know. It’s what makes it all so incredibly infuriating, because in life you can just — you know, smack the smoke detector with a broom or take the batteries out or something. An anxiety disorder doesn’t work like that, though god, I wish it did; it requires years of work and active effort and (for some of us) medication to dial down our reactions, even when we know, right down to our bones, that our reactions are wrong.
If you’ve ever read that when someone is having an anxiety attack, it’s not helpful to say “Calm down” or “Stop panicking” or shit like that: this is why. We are saying that crap in our heads already, only we are saying it louder than you, and with more frustration and self-loathing, because we have been trying without success to calm down and stop panicking for the balance of our lives.
I know it can be exasperating to deal with someone with anxiety — boy, do I. I deal with an anxious personality every waking minute of every single day, and let me tell you there are times I want to smack myself with a broom, take out my batteries, and let my whole fucking house burn down. But the thing is, if you have someone in your life with anxiety and their shit is bugging the hell out of you, you have an option at your disposal that they don’t: you can walk away. And if you’re someone who gets frustrated by other people’s anxiety, who can’t be patient, whose very nature compels them to point out that it’s not a big deal and we need to calm down and we’re making it more than it is — that’s okay, everyone has shit they can’t deal with, but use that option. Walk away. Tune it out. Don’t pile on, because that’s actually so counterproductive to the goal of getting the calm, rational person you know out from beneath their anxiety. The more you say the things we’re already thinking (this is stupid, just shut up already, calm down, this isn’t a big deal, why can’t you calm down), the more we become convinced everything in our heads is true, and the longer it takes us to shut it down.
As always, the best way to be helpful to someone with any kind of mental illness is to ask them, ideally during a time when they are calm and in control: what can I do, what do you need, what should I avoid doing, is there anything that helps. But short of that, I can’t tell you how helpful it is to have people in my life that I know aren’t going to echo back at me the shit I’m already yelling at myself. So: try not to do that to people. That’s all we’re asking. Try not to.
In a text post, list ten FICS that have stayed with you in some way. Don’t take but a few minutes, and don’t think too hard — they don’t have to be the “right” works, or even all the same pairing or fandom, just the fics that have touched you or that stuck with you somehow. Tag ten friends, including me, so I’ll see your list. Make sure you let your friends know you’ve tagged them! Nope. Sorry. I never do this. Just weird that way.
Remus goes with him down the supermarket on Tuesday; Sirius has nothing but bread in the cupboards, a few turquoise tins of beans, some cheap wine. (He likes to think if he keeps his cabinets full, if he gets rid that manky smell in the ice-box, Remus will stay the night, the month: to save the seven-stop tube ride, and take the other half of the wardrobe Sirius leaves empty, on purpose. That maybe Remus will call the flat in Islington with the yellow door, populated by twelve sorts of mould and one scared, scared boy with scabbed elbows — he will call it home, like the way he cupped his palms and told Sirius about fireflies; like the swell of Lily’s stomach.)
It may sound strange, but this 700 words of fanfiction has affected my writing more profoundly than, I think, any other piece of writing ever has. I found it as a teenager and fell in love with the way the words fit together, and just — the simplicity of it, the poignancy, how much was communicated just in that one line about Remus standing in front of the frozen peas. It has stayed with me, in a way I could not begin to explain, for the last decade. I expect it will stay with me a few decades more.
“Your memory is a monster; you forget—it doesn’t. It simply files things away. It keeps things for you, or hides things from you—and summons them to your recall with will of its own. You think you have a memory; but it has you.”—John Irving, A Prayer for Owen Meany (via simply-quotes)